Tex Norman

Teaching My Son To Ride a Bike



Posted: Wednesday, January 28, 2009

by









I remem
ber running beside him,
my hand gripping the seat of his bike,
my mind ready to brace him, to add
balance where it was needed, or to
catch him should he begin to fall,
and all the while I'm feeling his fear.
He knew what was expected.

He was supposed to trust me
and I could see he was trying to trust me,
but trust is earned and I was in default.
I was in paternal recession, a dad depression,
my stock had fallen for more than two
consecutive quarters. He couldn't find
his balance while trying to balance
my presence in his life. I left him
in an empty, slopping parking lot
where he used the gravity of this earth
sensing somehow that speed equals
distance divided by time, and
all the while he added balance
to his own life.

My son learned balance
by himself, alone, all alone, all on his own.
 
Tex Norman is a social worker, currently working at the Oklahoma DHS Abuse and Neglect hotline. He interviews people reporting abuse and/or neglect of children and vulnerable adults and writes a narrative. The narratives (and demographics) are used to initiate investigations of the allegations. He says it is like writing 8 to 10 stories a day. In August 2012, he will have been married to Kathie for 40 years. He has a son Ryan who earned a PhD from Princeton and he is now a scientist doing research in molecular biology. Tex spends his free time working as an artist and writer. He has one art site, and a blog that might be of interest: http://tex-norman.artistwebsites.com/ and http://collagepoetrybytex.blogspot.com/
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Top-level comments on this article: (4 total)
» left by Teresa Ortiz
 3 years 10 days ago.
187 fans.
Tex, this is beautiful and tough all at the same time. But look how your son turned out. A PhD at Princeton? You must have done a pretty good job, and who knows,  learning to balance all by himself may have been the best gift afterall.
 
Thanks for the touching story. Peace and God bless you always, Teresa
» left by Tex Norman 3 years 8 days ago.
47 fans.
Thanks Teresa:  I am so blessed and honored to have been my son's daddy.  He is adopted, so I easily could have missed this previlage.  I don't take credit for Ryan's power abilities, but I do hope I had something to do with how caring he is.  Ryan is ethical, caring, giving, and an unusually unselfish man.  Thank you for reading the poem, Teresa. 
» left by Ken McCreless
 3 years 8 days ago.
85 fans. Follow Ken McCreless on twitter!
You were there, weren't you? So many "dads" are never around, Tex. Very powerful poem.
» left by Tex Norman 3 years 8 days ago.
47 fans.
Thanks. Your words are kind and comforting.  I work as a social worker in child abuse, so I know that too many dads are absent dads, and deadbeat dads.  I was there.  My son turned out great.  Still I look back, on the child I had 30 years ago, and I do wish I had done more.  I love my son so much, I just wish I had shared it more then, and I wish I know how to share it now.


» left by Nancy Daniels
 3 years 7 days ago.
Tex,
 
I so agree with Tex but moreso the fact that your son is ethical, caring, giving, and an unusually unselfish man. We imitate our loved ones. You did a great job with Ryan. And that is the best compliment a person can receive.
 
Thanks for sharing that with us,
» left by Anonymous 2 years 342 days ago.
When does Ryan graduate? I used to work with him when he was in Dr. Obrien's lab and am finishing my PhD as well.
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