Home » Normans Suggestions for Responsible Commenting

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Sometimes I write stuff that is intentionally controversial. I say intentionally controversial because while I suppose it is possible to accidentally write something controversial I would be willing to bet that almost never happens. If you write about abortion, or gays, or tax increases, or atheism you know before you click that save button that it is controversial. Controversial stuff may be aimed at sparking a discussion and hopefully moving the issue forward through debate, but controversial articles also invite criticism and sometimes that criticism comes in the form of personal attacks. I would like to offer some suggestions for responsible commenting when you really loath what the writer has written.

1. Avoid Personal Attacks:

When I was in debate I remember getting upset with a speaker and saying, perhaps too loudly, "You're wrong!"

The immediate response from my teachers, "Never say, "You're wrong!" say, "I beg to differ." The professor went on explaining that we stick to facts, points, statistics, -- that we never attack the person and stick to attacking the ideas ONLY!

It is especially difficult to not attack when you are writing something on the Internet. Consider my article: Internet Snipers at http://searchwarp.com/swa387071.htm

We are faceless online and it is just easier to say things harshly when we don't have to look the receiver in the eyes. Internet comments are not the same thing as talking behind someone's back, but it is close.

If Search Wrap is to become a health environment for presenting varying points of view, then it is essential that all of us stay polite and civilized when we comment.. Posting personal attacks and being disrespectful does not add value to the discussion. I don't see how anyone can disagree with this, but maybe they can. I feel it is absolutely essential that all commanders should provide constructive feedback, and never, ever make derogatory comments toward another person. Do not demean or embarrass others. If you feel someone being a whinny big ole baby, throwing themselves a pity party, or that they are wrong, wrong, wrong then just explain why they are wrong, point my point, sticking to their text.

2. Make your comments content based.

If you disagree with a writer's points, then explain what it is you disagree with, and be specific. The value of comments is to cause readers to expand their thinking, to consider opposing points, facts, and the interpretations of data and either strengthening their faith in their own views, or perhaps changing their own views. The commenter is suppose to add value to the discussion. If you are going to comment, I would suggest that you consider whether what you are going to say will actually be of use to others reading your comment. If you aren't certain that it will, try rephrasing your comment or maybe even refrain from posting it. If you disagree with the author's point of view, that is fine, but explain why. Point out what it is you feel the writer got wrong and let the author and other readers know why you feel they were wrong, and what the correct view is, and why you think so.

3. Your comments should provide both be constructive feedback and compliments.

I investigate child abuse, and I am called upon to interview people who allegedly abused children, and often the allegations turn out to be true. Often these accused parents (innocent and guilty parents) are afraid I am going to take their children away from them, and they are angry that Child Welfare goons are in their home asking them sometimes embarrassing, and/or offensive questions. I have found that I can almost always find something an angry person says to me that I can agree with, if it is only that I understand what they are saying, and I would feel the same way if I were in their shoes.

4. Before you write a comment (if you aren't first) r ead any existing comments first.

Really. Somebody else may have already stated your point. If you write the exact same thing someone else wrote you might feel a little chagrined. Not only should you read the other comments, you should read the author's responses to the comments. If you post a comment very similar to someone else's comment then you are adding comment clutter. However, if your comment is similar, but has some important variance to some other commenter then you should stress that slight, but important difference.